Some Culinary blunders!!

Culinary blunders
If you have been bearing with my posts for quite some time now, you surely know about my Love for cooking. The above snap has been taken from my recipe diary. Yes, that is my handwriting (that's only if you are a graphologist...am all ears for you :)).
I would tell you about a few of my stories - Bad Day at The Kitchen.
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Story#1- Pompa and the Potols
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This is about my childhood friend, Pompa. Today, she has been married for about three years and can cook most of the things...but that was not the case...some eight-nine years ago, when we were in high school...back then, I was The Only "Hero" who knew how to cook...

During some vacation in school...Pompa's mom had to go out for an urgent work and asked (as a desperate last resort) Pompa to cook Potol (Parwal or Pointed Gourd - Thanks to Google for the English name)...
I chanced to visit her while she was fighting it out at the kitchen...
As I entered, I saw her sitting on the ground, both her hands occupied by pincers and a big-ish spoon...I used to be her best friend and whenever I went to meet her..she would look at me and smile "Raai"??
This time she looked at me and with a combination of expressions (confusion+relief) said.."Rai? Thank God...come here fast!"
I closed in (scared because I knew Pompa and her cooking skills)..and this is what I saw-
Pompa sitting on the ground...the lighted stove in front of her...the floor was flooded with greasy water, all of which was being spilled from the pan, mounted on the flame...
Me: Why have you added So Much water ?
Pompa: Almost on the verge of tears.. "What will I do...I've been trying for the past 20 minutes..but the Potols are refusing to get submerged in the curry...the more water I put, the more they keep floating on top. Rai. why aren't they going down at the bottom of the pan?" "Ma marbe to"...

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Story#2 - Hero's Heroism
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This story involves the same two characters as the first one.
I was in college then, Pompa had come down to our place and stayed back for the night. We were both supposed to go to our respective colleges the following morning.
My mom, before leaving for work asked me to cook some chicken for the two of us, have it, and then go to college.
Ma told me to take some curd from the refrigerator and use it for marinating the chicken.
Later during the day, I asked Pompa to help me with the cooking. I opened the fridge door and took out a usual red coloured clay container which contains curd brought from the regular sweet shops (in Bengal).
Curd/DoiI instructed Pompa to pour the curd into the chicken as I used my bare hands to mix it thoroughly...all the while chattering and laughing away to girlie chit-chats.
After quite some time, I realised that something was not right...

Me: "Pompa, dont you think there is something wrong with the curd?"
Pompa: "You are asking ME?"
Me: "Dumbo! Can't you even tell whether this is curd or not"
Pompa: "Oh yes, if you are the hero, why don't YOU find out yourself".."I don't know"...
Me: "Dhut, this does not have the consistency of curd"
Pompa: "May be because it is a little old"
Me: "May be, but why will it be sponge-like?...Pompa!! eat it and check no".

There was this thing with Pompa - a) She never refused me, and b) She NEVER refused food...

She took a spoonful from the container into her mouth and sat down on the floor, her face turned red, she was panting for breath...signaled for some water...I gave it to her...swallowed everything, then straight way lied down holding her stomach. She wasn't making any sound, her face was still red, I kneeled down next to her, shook her with one hand.."What happened Pompa?"
Now mademoiselle sat up, shook me half a dozen times and said...
"I will tell this to everybody...just wait"...and for the first time, made spine-chilling sounds of laughter.
"Ha ha ha ha...this is no curd, Rai, This is Malai Chomchom...spongy-spongy..malai chom-chom...The Hero, who knows how to cook was adding a sweet as a marinade in place of curd, I will tell this to everybody".

With friends like these, who needed enemies :)
She did tell it to everybody.

Even now, in any get-together, this topic keeps coming back and I go red in the face :)

1 comments:

    On March 19, 2009 at 3:19 PM Anonymous said...

    hilarious! :)

    sotyi...malai chicken er notun recipe sekha holo ekta. :)